Anxiety is a widely shared yet often misunderstood experience. It's a term that resonates with many, but its specifics can vary greatly from person to person. Just as no two individuals are exactly alike, the way anxiety is experienced differs from one person to another.
Consider this: if you were to ask 50 or even 500 people to define anxiety, you'd likely receive as many different answers. It's a concept that's both familiar and personal, shaped by our unique perspectives and experiences.
Before reading further, take a moment to jot down your own definition of anxiety. Writing it down can help you compare your thoughts more accurately.
Understanding and addressing anxiety begins with recognizing what it truly is. Is it a thought, a feeling, or perhaps a belief? Which comes first, the thought or the feeling? Do you know the five most common negative thoughts that people with troubling anxiety often tell themselves?
The five most common negative thoughts are: "There is something wrong with me," "I am broken," "I am defective," "I'm not good enough," and "I am different from other people, but in a negative way." How many of these did you identify in your own thoughts?
While feelings are often the first thing people notice in anxiety, it's important to understand that thoughts actually precede these feelings. It's like a chain reaction – our thoughts trigger our feelings, not the other way around. And when our thoughts are distorted or not true, they can lead to even more intense feelings of anxiety. In cognitive behavioral therapy, these distorted thoughts are referred to as thought distortions. When these thoughts are inaccurate, they can trigger distorted feelings.
For instance, in panic attacks, one of the most common thoughts is, "I feel like I am having a heart attack," which is a terrifying experience. Many people rush to the emergency room with these symptoms, only to find out it's likely just anxiety. Despite this reassurance, many return to the emergency room, fully believing they are experiencing a heart attack because the symptoms feel so real. This illustrates the concept of negative thoughts triggering intense fear, even when those thoughts are not based in reality.
Understanding anxiety as negative thoughts one believes to be true but are not is a crucial first step. Changing these thought patterns can be challenging and often requires a shift in perspective, which takes time, effort and self-compassion. It's like breaking a habit – our thought patterns can become deeply ingrained, just like our responses to anxiety.
In future discussions, we'll explore ways to challenge these negative thoughts and cope with anxiety in a healthier way. I'll delve into topics such as magical thinking, confirmation bias, all-or-nothing thinking, and the tendency to blame and victimize oneself through "Why" questions and labeling. Remember, you're not alone in this journey, and it's okay to ask for help.